Life

Tales From the FS Office

This morning I have telephone interviews scheduled. So I come in get settled. My FIRST out going call i’m treated to a lil bit of… I’m lying alot bit of Shawna Like the WHOLE DAMN SONG! Anyway I leave a message asking Ms. Cody to call me back.

Yall already know chic was screening her calls and called me RIGHT back. I start my interview, everything’s kosher until we get to Income and Shelter Expenses.

Me: Ms. Cody, What kind of income do you have?

Ms.C: I don’t have any income, I haven’t had any income in a long time.

Me: Well what happened to the tutoring jobs you used to have? And, when was the last time you did hair for money? (which is a complete and total crock of shit, If you haven’t graduated HS how do you honestly expect me to believe you are tutoring someones child ANDDDD getting paid for it! Miss me with that Bull. I don’t know why the last case worker bought it)

Ms C: OH! well school is out and they didn’t need me anymore. And I haven’t been doing hair in about 4 or 5 months.

Me: OK fine. (I’m not going to trip over something that really can’t be verified) Aren’t you still receiving Child Support?

Ms C: Oh Yea, (giggling) I forgot about that. I get $332/mo.

OK, so we go through a few more questions and get to the shelter expenses

Me: Ms. Cody, How much is your Rent?

Ms C: $695/mo

screeeeeeeeech (YES the record just skipped, fuck the Nickel, turn the music OFF)

Me: Does that amount include your Utilities as well?

Ms C: OH NO! My light bill is 120/mo and I pay gas and phone. Gas is $65, phone is $30.

At this point, please KNOW that I am just a bit disturbed.

Me: Are you PAST DUE on ANY of your bills?

Ms C: OH NO! (like I insulted her or something)

ME: OK, Ms. Cody, What you’re telling me is. You ONLY get $332/mo child support and that’s all the income you have coming in, b/c you don’t tutor anymore and you don’t do hair anymore?

Ms. C: Yup

ME: OK, and You’re also saying to me that your rent is 695 + Lights $120 + Gas $65 + and phone $30?

Ms.C: giggling.. yep, that’s a whole bunch of money. (then starts rambling on about how the the utilities are soo high, blah blah blah)

I’m break out my calculator her bills total 910/mo

Me: Excuse me, Not to cut you off, but Ms Cody, Somethings not adding up. Your only get 332/mo and your bills total 910/mo. That means EVERY month you are short $578. So tell me again how your rent AND utilities are current?

Ms C: Oh Ms. Johnson, The Grace of God

(Why did she do that, Don’t be throwing God up in your BS)

ME: And just HOW does God’s GRACE provide for you?

Ms C: huh?! Whatchu mean?

Me: God’s Grace does not make money miraculously appear out of thin air, if so, we are serving 2 different God’s. So how are you making your bills? Is someone paying something for you? Is someone giving you money? Do you get utility assistance? Do you have credits on your accounts? Money saved? What? Where are you coming up with the extra money.

Ms C: I don’t know, I mean I just do. I mean sometimes I sell my food stamps, i don’t know.

ME: Well even though your case could be closed INDEFINITELY b/c you admitted that you sell your stamps. Let’s just say it was okay for you to do that. What’s the going rate these days… uhh 2 for 1. 2 FS dollars for 1 cash dollar. Or to give you a lil bit more help lets say you sold them Dollar for Dollar. The most you would make is $234, Because that’s all you get monthly $234. Which STILL leaves you short.

What I’m going to do is request verification. I need a copy of your 2006 Tax returns, lease and rent rcpt, copies of your utility statements, and written statements from anybody who is helping you out monetarily. If you don’t send this back your case will close for failure to explain management.

And for future reference. I wasn’t born LAST night, HELL I wasn’t even born AT night.

Ms C: Ok Ok Ms Johnson, Don’t close me case, I get section 8 and they pay all the rent and I get utility vouchers. so between the utility vouchers and my child support I can afford to pay my bills, I just thought if yall knew I wouldn’t get no stamps.
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Do YOU BELIEVE THIS TRICK!

Soooooo,

How is YOUR day?!

4 thoughts on “Tales From the FS Office

  1. Yay, I love “Tales from the FS Office”! I’m convinced you’re lying though. People like this can’t really exist. I think you be makin it all up lol. Quote of the day: “And just HOW does God’s GRACE provide for you?” I almost fell out of my chair!! ROFLMAO!!!

  2. Girl! LAMO! You had to listen to Shawna just to leave a message? Wow!

    Girl! She’s a tutor without a HS diploma? And how can you charge money for “doing hair” if you don’t have a license? I can’t take it!

    God is good…but yeah, I’m with you, don’t bring God into this mess! I love that you took her to chuuch…so to speak.

    Girl! She did not admit to selling her foodstamps! *smh*

    Wow…wow…wow…I so could NOT do your job.

  3. Yup, I can believe that trick! LOL. I work with some ‘creative’ folks, too!

    Nooooo to Shawna! LOL

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